I imagined Buffalo roaming free as they did before America was discovered. When the indigenous people where in balance with Mother Earth. In 1970, this was an illustion.

Today I read in my magazine, the National Wildlife Federation, that “in late 2020, ownership and management of the National Bison Range, in Montana, finally passed from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Services (FWS) to the land’s original caretakers.”

“For tribal members the snow feels a bit warmer, and the hills, covered by clusters of evergreens, seem more poetic . . . it has been a long journey, but the Indian people, who say they are one and the same with the bison, are back caring for the land and its animals.”

Another example:

When I was getting my degree at Michigan State University I was focused on art and textiles of native, indigenous peoples, particularly in Africa and Japan. Industrialization has all but buried the arts and crafts of many ethnic groups. I have dreamed of their resurrection.

Several days ago I heard this recorded program on WEMU out of Eastern Michigan University. The show is Creative Impact with Deb Polich. This particular show was Discovering The Ancient Art And Craft of Oman Becomes a Lifetime Passion. 

It become a lifetime passion for Marcia Stegath Dorr, a UofM Grad and an example to us all.  A fire was lit when she saw the natives high level of art/craft being exploited by merchants buying them for a dime and selling them for $10.  The short version of Marchia’s journey first took her to the United Nations in 1990. Then to the Consultant to Omani-American Joint Commission, on up to developing an artisans’ marketing organization in Oman, onto the Advisor of Oman Ministry of Tourism: Dicertorate of Historical Sites Development, then in 2018 to the British Museum/Royal Ontario Museum/Oman National Museum Project. Most recently an producer in Paris, France as stepped forward to make a film to go with the museum’s presentation.

When you find your passion, hold onto it, follow it to its end. It will take to your ability to heal a wrong. The goodness and love in these two stories has me humbled out.

Let me know your thoughts.

National Wildlife, August-September Issue, p. 22-27. NWF.ORG/NW

Creative Impact, WEMU, David Fair and Deb Polich 07/27/21

#pashacoach

An emotional connection is a bond that holds partners together in a relationship. This ability is one of the most important strengths for human beings to have. Without a strong emotional connection, relationships can easily drift apart. 

See link below: Donna Pisacano Brown

“Human connection is an energy exchange between people who are paying attention to one another. It has the power to deepen the moment, inspire change and build trust.”

Do you doubt the importance of connection?

By neglecting our need to connect, we put our health at risk.

Connection to others can lower anxiety and depression, help us regulate our emotions, lead to higher self-esteem and empathy, and actually improve our immune systems. It is obvious, we all need to improve our immune systems with a pandemic.

Social isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness, fear of others, or negative self-esteem. Lack of consistent human contact can also cause conflict with the our friends. When isolated we may occasionally cause problems with family members.

The Cure for Loneliness

• Improve your social skills. Some researchers argue that loneliness is primarily the result of a lack of the interpersonal skills required to create and maintain relationships. … I understand and I will post more about this in future posts.
• Enhancing social support … asking for help. The truth is asking for help is a sign or strength.
• Increasing opportunities for social interaction … reaching out. Even online, you can make heart warming connections.
• Change negative thinking. … accentuate the positive.

Loneliness causes people to feel empty, alone, and unwanted. People who are lonely often crave human contact, but their state of mind makes it more difficult to form connections with other people. Imagine being a college freshman. You might feel lonely despite being surrounded by roommates and other peers. As children it was easier to forgive and forget and enjoy one another’s company.

Be aware! If you know someone who seems to spend a lot of time alone, it could be a sign that they are lonely. It can happen to anyone these days. One of your colleagues working from home and living alone is likely to feel lonely. They need someone else to initiate contact. Just to say, “Hello, how are you? Let me know your thoughts.” Or something else more natural for you; you know what I mean.

Why Talk to Yourself: How It Makes You Smarter! Besides, you will appear to be using your voice activated, hands-free device.

Talking to yourself helps you to clarify your thoughts. It will help to determine what’s important and firm up any decisions you’re contemplating. But only if you speak respectfully to yourself.

What happens to your body when you’re lonely? “When you’re experiencing loneliness, your levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, go up.

Cortisol can impair cognitive performance, compromise the immune system, and increase your risk for vascular problems, inflammation and heart disease.”

Before there is any real damage: Pick up your phone to call and speak with them. Use FaceTime, WhatsAp or Zoom. Say, hello, in there; straight into their hearts and minds. If you make it easy, it will be easy.

Donna Pisacano Brown, 2018. She knew this before COVID!

https://www.liherald.com/stories/the-power-of-human-connection,102632

Scientists have long been telling us that animals and plants are subordinate to us in self-awareness and the ability to feel satisfied. Not true. Some of you know where I may be going with this. But no, that is for another blog post.

Today, I am determined to write a special blog for fathers. Happy Father’s Day, to all you daddies. 

You know if you offend your dog, your cat, bird, or mistreat your plants they wither, they retreat.

So it is also with humans. We know nasty treatment comes in many forms. I know, you know you need to end it with your generation, now.

I say this fully intending to help. I pray I come across without judgement. If you feel judged, know I do my best not to judge.

On this Father’s Day dear dads, please be aware of The Line. The Line is not be be crossed. Every living thing has a line to stay within. When you cross it, you trigger that withering response, that retreat. 

Dad’s, you have everything a person can have in life. You have a family. That’s huge. It requires you trade your old life for a new life. A life of being good to your partner and children. Having a family is unlike anything else on Earth. You get what you give.

The plants do it right. Just look out over a field, . . . my empty lot next door.  Animals do it right. Watch the Animal Channel or read Nature, the magazine, The Sierra Club Magazine or Nature Conservatory. For more inside information read Peter Wohlleben’s books.

Get into it. Not only for your own sake, but also, for the reputation of Men. It seems someone, somewhere, worldwide, gave men the permission to slack-off. Not you, of course, but far too many men are sitting in easy chairs while their full-time working/at-home working partner does everything for them. Who died and made you KING. Gee whiz. Your partner does not want to have to ask you to participate in the life you created together. You need to get up and volunteer to help create and maintain it.

So much can be said, communicated in a kind and loving way. When an attitude changes and a positive, loving spin is applied to everything you say, it grows like the lawn you trim throughout the Summer. Ask for appreciation after you have given it. Then, watch how easily you get the appreciation returned to you. The respect and appreciation you deserve after your performance. Like your event, or your position on the field, you have a grand play as Dad.

Remember:

Every living thing has

a line you do not cross.

Your sensitivity is your strength.

Kindness is your tool.

The ball is in your hands.

We also feel our history, our personal history, often and in many ways.

Growing up had two chapters. The first chapter was abundant. Dad was a successful lawyer in his own practice. We had a five bedroom, three story brick house on two lots in Allen Park, MI. We had everything, very often new clothes, lots of food, dinners out, and many vacations. Year by year, time went on . . . then, life changed.

I was awake at night to hear Dad’s abuse of Mom. His deep booming voice minimizing her natural goddessness. And then a thump and a quiet sobbing. Shocked and deeply sad, I had a decision to make. As a 12yr old child, did I allow this intel to minimize me, after all, this was my mother and father!  Or did I wait, use time to see how it turned out, keeping my thoughts to myself.   I chose the latter, like most 12yr olds in the 1960s.

Mom and Dad were divorced in less than a year. We moved from that house, plenty big for eight, into a house too small for the six of us. Now we had one pair of sneakers, one pair of boots, minimally just what we needed. Consequently we had to keep our clothes clean and ready to wear again, day after day.

The most profound change was with dinner. Pre-divorce we were required to be on-time, face and hands washed and seated at 6pm. We heard a passage from the Bible and learned a new word weekly from the dictionary. Dad would quiz us through the week to correctly pronounce, spell and recite the weekly word. We had to share what happened to us and how we felt about it. And we had to be excused before we left the table.

Post-divorce dinners only happened when someone complained they were starting to get hungry. Hand washing was only when my sister and I thought our younger brothers’ hands were “too gross.” What was served was often over- cooked from a slow-cooker Mom started before she went to work. Or it was something I could devise from little bits of left-overs and flavors hidden deep in the fridge and cupboards. Again, I chose to experience this as early training for my future career as a fine dining chef or as “the gourmet chef” in our big Italian family. What happened that day and our feelings about it were now left unsaid at dinner, to built up stress. Instead, we would talked it out in private one-on-one. Sometimes the tension got very heated, depths-of-our-soul types of emotions.

Pre-divorce and post-divorce both had positive and negative aspects and life lessons. Far beyond simply being fed, communal dinners nourish in a total feeling way. It does this in many forms, often indescribable. As long as people have face-to-face contact, and especially if they’re tightly linked by an emotional bond.

It’s a tradition worthy of preserving, resurrecting, or creating new, now.

Start from where you are.

From my heart, let me express to you how much choice you have every way, everyday. As a kid, and still today, I use my imagination to keep growing, keep flowing along. Very little needs to be ingested, it’s up to you. 

Well, many times it doesn’t happen. There is some kind of disconnect between what we intend to do and what actually happens. This disconnect can disappoint people, shake-up relationships, derail a promotion at work, lose a job, cause a bad review, harm a friendship or cause a love-loss creating heartache.

Its a matter of clarity and will power. Make it easy on yourself and just be clear on what you truly can do yourself, and very mindful of what you promised someone else. When you say, I will ______(do this particular something). JUST DO IT!

Start slow; start with following-through once, then, advance to trying it once-a-day. As time goes on you will develop a habit of following-through with what you said you would do. There are big pay-offs.

You’ll notice people trust you more. That’s a nice thing. Over time the benefits grow, exponentially. People will compliment you, choose to spend time with you, it goes on and on.

Thoroughness, following-through is best when the thing to do is for yourself. I have heard that one should not cross themselves. That is the same as telling yourself you will do something and not doing it, then, pretending it doesn’t matter to you. Believe me, it matters. It wears you down. I’ve been there. I’ve done that.

You are born with an independent free will that has power. Take it out from the place you have had it tucked-away, shake the wrinkles out of it, dust it off. Give this power some fresh-air and sunshine, or a good shot of expresso. Get it in action.

You go . . . avatar.

Wardrobe Tip for Today: When your favorite winter jacket’s zipper insert starts to fray there is a fix. You can sew it so it stays strong and does not get worse, requiring installation of a whole new zipper. That is a huge hassle or a big expense. So check out this series of photos and leave a comment is you have questions.

Every family member sat down to dinner at the same time every night of the week.

All of the food was on the table. Dishes were passed around with a big spoon for scooping up your portion divided by the number of mouths around the table. When you tried to skip the peas, you got a commanding lecture.

You were asked how your day went and what was bothering you. You could have an excuse not to be there, but it had to be a real good one. The next day at dinner you had to give an accounting of that place, who was there, what you did and how you felt about it.

You couldn’t talk back or make a smart remark.

You also could not walk away until you were excused.

So what did we get for all the trouble it took to participate in this somewhat repressive ritual?   We learned to have a day that was valuable, reportable to people who day after day showed us how concerned they were about our lives. Relatives who we saw everyday and who cared about us.

We learned to talk to others openly face-to-face about how we feel and get their feed-back, perspective, validation. We learned to mean what we say and say what we mean.

Back then we called it Integrity. Now, they call it “being real.”

Except for some very fortunate households, on the whole we no longer practice this ritual nor any of the virtues attached to it. Perhaps we need to consciously decide what kind of world we want to have going forward. I want to suggest that we ought to make a conscious decision about how we want to relate to one another.

Those nightly dinners fed more than our bodies.